Letter of Wishes

Last verified: December 2025 (England & Wales)

Your Will, your trusts, and your Lasting Powers of Attorney (LPAs) are the legal instructions.

A Letter of Wishes is the context behind them. It helps the people you have appointed understand what you meant, especially when they have discretion or need to make judgement calls.

A Letter of Wishes can guide decisions, but it cannot change your Will, override a trust, or override an LPA.

Quick-read summary

• Guidance, not law: it supports your legal documents but does not replace them.

• Particularly helpful where someone has discretion (trustees, attorneys, guardians).

• Useful when family dynamics are complex, emotions may run high, or a decision may be questioned later.

• Often the best place for practical “human” details, including pet care preferences and routines.

• We draft Letters of Wishes to fit your exact circumstances, so it is helpful without creating risk.

What a Letter of Wishes is (and what it is not)

A Letter of Wishes is a separate document where you explain your preferences, reasoning, and priorities. It sits alongside your legal documents and supports them.

It is not legally binding. That is often why it works. It can be updated and refined as life changes, without having to rewrite your entire Will every time you want to clarify something.

If something must happen, it belongs in the Will or the LPA. If it is guidance and context, it may belong in a Letter of Wishes.

Balanced view

Benefits
• Adds human context that legal documents cannot capture.
• Helps executors, trustees, attorneys and guardians make consistent decisions under pressure.
• Can reduce misunderstandings, especially where family dynamics are sensitive.

Cautions
• It is guidance, not law. Decision-makers must still act within their legal duties.
• In some disputes, it may be disclosed if required for fairness.
• If it contradicts your Will, any trusts, or your LPAs, it can create confusion, so it needs to be professionally aligned.

When it is most useful

A Letter of Wishes is worth considering if any of the following are true:

• You have a blended family or sensitive relationships.

• You are leaving unequal gifts, you are consciously leaving someone out, or you expect your choices may be questioned.

• Your Will includes a trust, and trustees will have discretion.

• You have appointed attorneys under an LPA and want to reduce guesswork if a difficult decision arises.

• You have young children and want to guide guardians on priorities and routines.

• You have pets, especially where there are dietary requirements, medication routines, or strong preferences about who should care for them.

Wills: what it can cover

A Will sets out what happens to your estate. A Letter of Wishes can add the “why” behind your decisions.

This is often helpful where:

• You have chosen certain executors (and not others).

• You have treated beneficiaries differently, for reasons you want understood.

• You have deliberately excluded someone and want your reasoning recorded in a calm, measured way.

• You want to give guidance on sentimental items or family heirlooms without turning your Will into a long list.

• You want funeral wishes recorded as guidance.

The aim is not to justify yourself to everyone. It is to help your decision-makers do a good job, calmly and confidently.

Trusts: where it is especially valuable

If your Will includes a trust, trustees may have discretion. A Letter of Wishes is often the document that turns a trust from “technically correct” into “practically workable”.

A Letter of Wishes can help trustees understand:

• What the trust is trying to achieve, in plain English.

• Your priorities for support, stability, education, housing, and wellbeing.

• How you would want them to balance competing needs or competing beneficiaries.

• The tone you would want them to take when dealing with sensitive family dynamics.

It does not remove trustee discretion. It guides it.

Trustees may need to explain decisions later. Clear context can reduce second-guessing and family conflict.

LPAs: how a Letter of Wishes can help attorneys

An LPA gives legal authority to your attorneys. A Letter of Wishes helps them understand how you would want that authority used, within the legal framework and the reality of the situation at the time.

This can be helpful for:

• Your general priorities (independence, familiar routines, dignity, staying at home where possible).

• Who you would want consulted and kept informed.

• Preferences around care, support, religious or cultural matters, and quality of life.

• How you would want risk balanced against safety.

A good Letter of Wishes can reduce stress for attorneys at exactly the moment you would want them to feel supported and confident.

Guardians: guidance that helps without micromanaging

Where guardians may be involved, a Letter of Wishes is often where the most helpful practical guidance lives.

This might include:

• The values you would want reflected in day-to-day parenting.

• Schooling preferences and what matters most to you.

• Important relationships you want maintained.

• What helps your child feel safe, stable, and secure.

Other things people often want covered

A Letter of Wishes can also be the right place to record practical, personal guidance that does not belong in a legal document, for example:

• How you would like communication handled across different branches of the family.

• Any sensitivities, triggers, or known conflict points you want your executors, trustees, attorneys or guardians to be aware of.

• Pet care preferences and routines, especially where wellbeing depends on consistency.

The best Letters of Wishes are specific enough to be useful, but not so detailed that they create arguments or unintended pressure. That is where professional drafting helps.

Cases

blended family, keeping the peace

Helen has children from a first relationship and is now remarried. Her Will is clear, but she worries her children will assume the worst. Her Letter of Wishes explains the intention behind her plan, the outcome she wanted, and the tone she would hope the family takes. It does not change who inherits, but it reduces conflict.

Explaining an unequal gift without inflaming the situation

David leaves more to one child, because that child has provided long-term support and made sacrifices to help. The Will is legally clear. The Letter of Wishes records the context in a calm way so that executors can respond consistently if questions arise.

Consciously leaving someone out, and reducing the risk of misunderstanding

Priya excludes an estranged relative. She does not want an emotional document, and she does not want her executors dragged into a family argument with no guidance. Her Letter of Wishes sets out the background briefly and respectfully, and supports her executors if the decision is challenged.

Guiding trustees where discretion matters

Imran’s Will includes a trust for his son, who is capable but impulsive with money. The trust gives trustees discretion. Imran’s Letter of Wishes sets out priorities, stability first, then education and housing, then wider support. The trustees still decide, but they have a sensible framework.

Supporting attorneys under pressure

Moira’s attorneys under her Health and Welfare LPA later face a difficult care decision. Moira’s Letter of Wishes explains what “quality of life” means to her and who she would want consulted. The attorneys still act within the law and the circumstances, but they are not guessing what she would have wanted.

Pets with dietary requirements and a strict routine

Sam has a rescue dog with a sensitive stomach, prescription food, and a feeding schedule that cannot be changed without causing illness. Sam also knows the dog struggles with unfamiliar environments. The Will deals with who is to take the dog (and any money set aside to support that). The Letter of Wishes covers the practical reality: the feeding routine, the medication, the vet details, what the dog is like day-to-day, what settles it, and who the dog already trusts. It is not about luxury. It is about wellbeing.

Frequently asked questions

Is a Letter of Wishes legally binding?

No. It is guidance. Your Will and LPAs are the legal documents.

Can it override my Will, trust, or LPA?

No. It should support your legal documents, not contradict them.

Is it useful if I think my choices might be questioned or challenged?

It can be. A calm, well-drafted Letter of Wishes can help your executors and trustees understand your intention and respond consistently if questions arise.

Can it include pet guidance?

Yes. It is often the best place for practical pet-care details, especially where consistency affects wellbeing.

Legal and technical notes
• A Letter of Wishes is not legally binding, but it is often treated as a relevant factor when trustees or attorneys exercise discretion.
• It should support your legal documents, not compete with them. Consistency matters.
• If there is a dispute, it may be looked at by others (including potentially a court), which is why clear, careful drafting is important.

Storage and access

We will advise you on who should have a copy, when they should see it, and how it should be stored, based on your family dynamics and what you include.

Supporting documents and planning tools
Where it helps, we can also link your Letter of Wishes into wider planning, for example:
• Life & Legacy Logs, to capture the personal details that matter most (family, care preferences, routines, stories, and practical context).
• A joined-up file set (Will, any trusts, LPAs and Letter of Wishes) so your decision-makers can access the right information quickly, without hunting.

Fern Wills & LPAs can professionally store your Letter of Wishes, Will and LPAs to keep everything together, protected, and easy to retrieve when needed. We can also store these documents even if they were not written by us.

The right document, in the right hands, at the right time. Professional storage helps make that happen.

Next steps

Call us or use the contact form on this website to get started. We will guide you through the process, draft your Letter of Wishes in a safe, practical way, and make sure it supports your Will, any trusts, and your LPAs.